Musings of a Mom

Jill has always been interested in learning how to read, write, do math, et cetera.  She was easy to prepare for kindergarten.  She was hungry for information and we were happy to provide her with tools to feed that hunger.

Jack is a completely different child.  He’s a smart kid but he has a completely different learning style.  He is very hands on and does not want to sit down to learn to read or write.  He wants to build, explore and be active.

You would think that knowing how he learns would make the process simple but it doesn’t.  The way I learn best is a mix of Jack’s and Jill’s styles with a little more emphasis on Jill’s side.  Since I am the one who works most with Jack it is up to me to find ways to teach him.  I have tried games, songs, videos, and various other ways to gain his interest but they only work for a few minutes.  I know a few minutes are better than none, but still…  He doesn’t have A.D.D. because he can sit for hours playing with Legos or Bionicles.

I don’t worry about it too much and, for the most part, I figure he’ll be fine, but it’s a bit difficult for me to shift gears between the two learning styles. I could take Jill to the library and she’d be happy for hours.  Jack would be much happier in a hardware store. 

Yesterday Hubby and I took the kids on a tour of a submarine.  When my sister asked Jack about it he was really excited.  She asked, “Could you see the water through the windows?”  Jack looked puzzled for a bit and said, “There are no windows on a submarine.”  My sister said, “Well, what did you see in the submarine?”  Jack said, “Lots and lots of mechanical stuff!  It was COOL!!!”  Jill enjoyed the tour too but she just kept commenting on the fact that the submarine had a lot of doors to go through.

So I’ll keep trying to find ways to teach Jack to write the alphabet, but if anyone has suggestions, I’d love to hear them. 

By the way, I’ll be trying to teach him how to tie his shoes soon.  Any suggestions?

My kids are driving me bonkers!  It’s the halfway point of summer and they are bouncing off the walls.  This has been a busy summer with lots of activity and still they act like they have been caged up for months.

One thing I don’t have a problem with is my kids saying “I’m bored.”  My kids have always been pretty good about entertaining themselves and I find it interesting to hear my friends complain about their children claiming to be bored.  Last summer Jill overheard one of my friends talking about the issue and Jill decided to try the phrase out and see what happened.  She found out quickly that it was not a good idea.  Our conversation went something like this:

            Jill:  Mom, I’m bored.

            Me:  Really?  You can’t think of ANYTHING to do?

            Jill:  No.

            Me:  Do you want me to think of something for you?

            Jill:  Yes.

            Me:  Are you sure about that?

            Jill:  (Thinks for a moment first.) Yes.

            Me:  Well, you can dust, sweep, fold some clothes, clean the toilets –

            Jill:  Never mind.  I’ll think of something myself.

            Me:  I thought so.

This summer they haven’t said “I’m bored,” and they don’t seem to be other than they seem to be tired of each other.  It’s the typical sibling rivalry really.  They start out playing and get louder and something comes up and suddenly they are arguing.  The funny thing is everyone I’ve talked to this week has said the same thing: “My kids are driving me nuts!  I can’t wait for school to start!”

To everyone out there experiencing the same, may we all survive the rest of summer.

 Kids are smart. As a parent I have to try to stay one step ahead of my kids which is not easy even when they’re young.

I remember as a kid trying to talk my parents into things but I don’t remember using their words against them or purposely trying to manipulate them. Now if you ask them they probably have a different view but this is my blog and I think I was pretty angelic. My parents can start their own blog if they so choose, But I’m getting sidetracked here, so I’ll get back to the point.

My children are manipulative! They think they are smart but I’ve caught them. I’ve heard them manipulating their grandparents by saying things like “But I’m your favorite granddaughter.”  (Jill’s their only granddaughter.)  But manipulating their parents? That’s awful!

We were taking Jill out for a special evening because she had passed a big test. Yes, this is summer.  No, it didn’t have anything to do with school, but it is something she had been working on for more than a year and so we were celebrating. We let her pick her favorite restaurant (and let me tell you Jill has expensive taste.) and we got dressed up to go. Jill has grown over the summer so it was difficult to figure out what to wear as she’s outgrown her shoes. The outfit she chose was black and the dress shoes that fit were either brown or white. She wanted to wear the brown and I told her to wear the white (trust me on this - if you really need to know why leave a comment and I’ll reply). In our arguing, I said that the brown didn’t make sense with the black, A few minutes later she came out of her room with the white shoes on and said “Mom, the white shoes just don’t make sense with the black outfit.” Then she looked at what I was wearing and said, “Is that top purple? I just don’t think it makes sense with black pants.”

Today it was Jack’s turn. He knew he was in trouble for having toys spread throughout the house but still he came trying to get me to buy more. He approached me in such an innocent way. “Mom,” he said, ”what’s the store with the name of a day in it?” I told him the name and then he said asked “Did you say you wanted to take me there?” Um, that would be a big N-O right now.

These kids may know how to work their grandparents but they’re going to have to work harder on dear old Mom and Dad. I have to admit though that there is a part of me that thinks, “Hey, that was pretty smart” when they do try. So please wish me luck in not falling for their traps, I think I’m going to need all the help I can get.

 Young children are constantly learning. They learn through play, through observation and through listening. I love catching those little moments when a child discovers something new and tries it for himself. I especially love when kids hear new words and then try to use the word in conversation. Sometimes the attempts are successful and sometimes they are not but at least the child is trying.

Last night Hubby took Jack to swim lessons and when they got back I asked how the lesson went. Jack said, “It was horrible! I accidentally swallowed some water and it went down into my ecosystem!”

Jack’s comment reminded me of a time when Jill was little and we were celebrating Easter with her grandparents. Jack and Jill both said “Happy Easter” and Jill proudly added “and Happy Pass Away!”

Hey, she was trying.

When Jack and Jill were toddlers they loved to play with remote controls. Jill started playing with the TV remote one day and changed the settings. Hubby and I played around with the thing to try to reset it and we even resorted to reading the manual but we never could figure out how to change the settings back. Instead, we did the next logical thing - we adjusted ourselves to the new settings. We also got some non-functioning remotes and let her play with them.

At one point Jill showed interest in the computer keyboard and my mother-in-law supplied Jill with a cordless keyboard that she could play with. You may be thinking, why not steer her in another direction? We have learned two things about kids: 1) they are curious and if you take something away it becomes more fascinating (or sometimes they actually forget about it) and 2) if it won’t hurt them, find a way to let them have it so that they can explore and learn. Jill knew her alphabet by sight at age 2 ½ and she knew the placement on the keyboard by age 3.

So now they are older and still fascinated with gadgets. They also like to emulate the people around them and I was recently given a better understanding of what I do with my time.  I obviously spend more time on the phone than I thought. In my defense though, I work from home and my work sometimes requires me to be on the phone and then of course, there are the calls from my mom, my sister and friends. Well, yes, I use the phone but back to the kids…

My kids recently won a couple of calculators as prizes. Instead of using the calculators to add or subtract Jack and Jill opted to pretend they were cell phones. The kids would wander through the house talking to imaginary friends or to each other. They took their “phones” in the car and my husband and I would hear two separate conversations being conducted behind us. The kids even took their phones to swim lessons. The swim teacher asked if we had bought the kids I Phones! Once Jill noticed that her father was listening to her conversation she said, “Excuse me but there’s a little thing called privacy.”

Now I know I don’t say things like that and neither does my husband but it’s scary to see the glimpses of teen attitude quickly approaching. All I can say is that we’ll do our best to enjoy the kids’ childhood while bracing ourselves for the future and we’ll continue to watch what we say when we’re on the phone. It’s pretty sobering to hear your child say, “Oh, hold on while I get rid of this other call” and then pretend to use call-waiting.