Musings of a Mom

When my sister and I were kids we fought like cats and dogs.  Our mom would say, “You should be nice to each other. One of these days you’ll be best friends.” And we would answer back that there was NO way we would ever be friends. Now we’re adults and if you’ve been reading my blog then you know that Mom was right. 

Jack and Jill are still young enough to enjoy playing together. Don’t get me wrong, they fight with each other too. But they’re still at an age where there’s more time spent playing than fighting. Plus it helps that Jack thinks Jill walks on water.

Since Jack was just a little guy (because he’s such a big guy now) he’s loved to copy whatever Jill does. He has his own interests but he also likes to do the things she loves. He’s played her games, tried the same sports and watches the same movies. 

Jill is used to having a following though. When she was still in daycare she was the only girl among a group of younger boys. These boys too thought she was someone to idolize. I still hear stories from the other parents of how their boys wanted to be princesses because Jill thought she was a princess. She did tell them that they had to be princes, but that was just not enough. They wanted to be just like her.

One day Jack had a growth spurt and his shoes suddenly didn’t fit. Out of desperation, we pulled out a pair of Jill’s old tennis shoes for him to wear to daycare. He told the boys who the shoes’ previous owner was and the boys spent the day telling Jack how lucky he was. From what I hear, they also spent a lot of time that day staring at Jack’s feet.

Now Jack is a bit older but he still admires his big sister. So this weekend I took him to get a new pair of swim goggles and instead of choosing a pair in his favorite color, he opted for a pair just like Jill’s. He was so happy and when he showed her the goggles he proudly said, “Now we can be goggle twins!” Jill, however, was a bit miffed. She is now at an age where she wants her own identity and is struggling to see that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. I must say though, she’s not completely put off when he copies her. She chalks it up to his being little and figures he’ll grow out of it, which, of course, he will. That is the point when the fighting will occur on a more regular basis and I will start telling them that they should be nice to each other because hopefully when they grow up they’ll be best friends too.

When I was a kid my family used to go camping a lot. Many times they were spur-of-the-moment trips with things left behind (like the tent pole, some of the sleeping bags and various other items.) As time went by sleeping in tents evolved into sleeping in a trailer and now my parents opt to rough it by renting cabins.

Early on in our relationship my husband informed me that when he is on vacation he does not want to work, therefore we would stay in hotels versus camping because camping is work. I was quick to jump on board with that way of thinking. Ironically, many a vacation has been spent working on our house.

Last week my parents informed us that they were going camping and were taking Jill with them (they take her every year) and asked if Jack and Hubby and I would like to join them for the weekend. Hubby and I decided we would do this for the kids and so we packed up the van and off we went.

The campsite is a three-hour drive from our home and so every few minutes Jack asked, “Are we there yet?” or “When will we be there?” Jack still doesn’t have a good understanding of time so we had to explain in terms he could grasp, “We’ll be there in 12 Sponge Bobs.” “Six more Sponge Bobs to go!” We had plenty of things available to entertain him but he was anxious to get there. He was excited about fishing with grandpa for the first time.

As we approached the campgrounds, Jack started yelling, “Look at the nature! It’s nature!  Look!” On one side of the road was a lake and on the other side was a water treatment plant. Of course, while Jack was yelling about nature, he was looking at the trees surrounding the water treatment plant. When we explained that we were in the forest, he just said, “Really?” 

Jack was so excited about being in nature that the first thing he wanted to do was go swim in the pool. Yes, this campground has a pool so that you don’t swim in the lake, at least that’s my theory. He did eventually go in a row boat on the lake and then came back and threw up. He never did go fishing. He did, however, spend some time collecting rocks in the “hall” behind our cabin. 

The kids had a great time and want to go back. If Jack was that excited over this version of camping imagine what he’d be like sleeping in a tent in the middle of nowhere!

My son has a very rich fantasy life. We often have to spend a little time trying to figure out who or what he is and how to address him. He might be a dinosaur one day and a Bionicle spider the next. (For those of you who don’t know what Bionicles are, they are a series of creatures made by LEGO and are for kids age 8 and older, but when you have an older cousin you get introduced to these things at a much younger age.)

Buddy has a new interest in all things Star Wars. He has this interest because his cousin likes Star Wars and Buddy thinks the world of his cousin. So Saturday Buddy puts on his dark blue robe which is much too long for him and gives him the appearance of being Darth Vader-like. He takes his toy light saber and goes to visit his cousin. As he’s getting ready he asks, “Mom, do I look like Darth Vader?” I thought he said “Dark Vader” so I said, “Sure, you look like a dark Vader.” He corrected me but apparently liked the name because from then on, when he’s wearing his robe, we are expected to address him as Dark Vader.

In informing my father that my son must be called Dark Vader, my dad looked at him and asked, “Who are you? The Aggravator?” I like that one personally, but lord Darkness did not.

Later I made a remark to my nephew that Dark Vader did not approve of so he pointed his light saber at me and said, “Don’t say that again or I will have to DISTRACT you!” I understood that he meant destroy, but go ahead distract away.

I love to watch him when he’s lost in a fantasy. I love to see how he stays in character when the “outside world” interrupts his play. I like how he modifies names and such to fit into his fantasy and make it his own. What a wonderful thing imagination is.